Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Where, O Where Has She Been?





You never know what's going to come your way, but this one has been harder than most surprises: on April 1 my mom was diagnosed with stage 4 cervical cancer. After hearing all the options, none of which were good, she decided to forego treatment and go into hospice care. She stayed pretty much symptom-free except for loss of appetite until mid May, but it became clear a few weeks ago that she shouldn't live by herself any longer and she moved into my house on June 6. As soon as she moved here I realized that she had been hanging onto her independence by sheer force of will, but that she was much sicker than she had let on--too sick to stay by herself. We found a companion to come here every morning and I am working half time for the foreseeable future.

Around this central fact, though, the rest of life goes joyfully on. My son, the baby of the family, graduated from college in May, and dd2 got engaged last week. (See the happy couple.) They have been together for almost 7 years, so this is a much-anticipated joy!

Knitting has been a solace and companion through this so far. For about a week after the diagnosis I couldn't knit anything but dishcloths, and since then I have been drawn to charity knitting projects that can be finished quickly. The hats (the blue one is a child-size Maltese fisherman's hat from Summer Interweave Knits) and scarf pictured are going to Afghans for Afghans, which my LYS is participating in, and I finished a red scarf for the red scarf project. There are other projects on needles that I expect to make progress on because mom really likes for someone to be close by, and I try to have a project by every potential sitting area in the house and on the porch.

Thanks in advance for all the kind thoughts I know will be coming this way.

2 comments:

juliet said...

Wow Ellen - the news about your mum is really tough, my thoughts are with you. It is nice you also have good news and good things happening (that must mean a lot to you and your mum). My thoughts are with you and I hope you are kind to yourself and remeber your needs too

Nancy said...

I was thinking about you yesterday. I hope all is as well as possible. It sounds like you're doing the best you can during a hard time of life. You'll always know you were there for your mother when she needed you most. Keep up the therapy knitting.

Congratulations on the happy annoucements. All the old sayings about life and its circle make perfect sense sometimes.